That was the first thing I said when I saw the damage. There was really nothing else I could say.
As a part of my boundary defying, spiritually enhancing get-fit programme, I’ve decided to inject sport back into my daily routine. I know, I’m a genius. You’re all welcome. Time to get off the treadmill/stationary bike and pick up the soccer ball again. I know that breaking a monotonous routine with something enjoyable was something I’d never seriously considered. I’d never taken it seriously. Before, I was all about doing the most amount of exercise in the least amount of time. But in doing that, I sacrificed a bit of my soul. When I say that I was really enjoying kicking the ball around again, I mean it. I was actually getting pretty good at it too. The basic drills I was doing (thank goodness for YouTube, am I right?) were getting easier by the day, so I decided I could move on to more involved things. You know, some awe inspiring tricks that would make me the life of the party.
That was when I started to learn how to backflip and throw the ball. Like the professional goalies can, you know?
That was going pretty well too … until the ball damaged my brand new aluminium windows. All of Melbourne must have heard the shattering of that glass, and along with it the shattering of my heart, bank account, and dreams of being a semi-professional soccer player. I’m not really one hundred percent sure how, but I must have thrown that ball pretty hard, because not only did I shatter the glass, but I actually managed to create a huge dent in the window frame. Basically, it’s not just going to be a matter of putting in new glass. I’m going to have to find someone who can do aluminium window repairs in Melbourne. What a hassle. It’s not like I need to put another item on my plate.
For all that shattered and the time it’s going to take to repair it, I can give this day a score no higher than a 4/10.