Bandit vs Dog

If anybody knows a dog remover, could you please send one my way? I’ve been stuck in this closet for two days now, as the dog guarding this office absolutely refuses to leave or even take a nap. I was really hoping the office’s workers would be back by now, given that it’s Monday, but it turns out that the entire office is out on annual leave for the next two weeks. I can only hope this dog gets bored or something soon, because I don’t know how much longer I can last in here. I’ve only got one bottle of water and some nuts with raisins.

You try to do a nice thing for some office workers, and look what happens! I wanted to gift them with the greatest office fitout in the Melbourne area, but it seems that dream is gone. I’ll be lucky to escape this place with my life. Perhaps the universe could deliver me some sort of kindness for trying to do something so nice for all these office workers. Instead of staring at boring white walls all day, they would have been working in a cyberpunk-themed office that inspired them to do their best.

Of course, I could just call Frankie and get her to come help me, but she thinks I’m on that important business trip. I’d have to admit that I lied about that and let her work out that I’ve fallen back to my old ways. I may not be smashing glass anymore, but I’m breaking into buildings to deliver Melbourne office design the people will never forget. I’m not stealing anything, so what I’m doing is only a misdemeanour. Even still, I don’t want her to know what’s really happening here. I promised that I’d leave my life of minor crime behind.

So, I’ll have to work out a way to defeat this crazy dog on my own. Maybe I could sing it a song to put it to sleep? It’s worth a shot, I guess…

– Bandit